Writer Ba Jin said:

“Your relatives are a group of people who want to get something from you. When they can’t get what they want, they’ll immediately turn against you without any emotions.”

Relatives are a gift from heaven to each person. When we’re born, we have a thousand threads of relationships with them.

This emotional connection doesn’t need any external help, nor do we need to make extra efforts to build it.

Maybe during the holidays, all your relatives will come to visit you, and maybe some relatives have lived with you under the same roof for half a lifetime.

Because we see each other often, we understand each other. Because we’ve lived together for half a lifetime, we know each other inside out.

What kind of person is this? It’s not about whether they’re your relative, friend, or stranger.

It’s about how they treat you when you’re down.

You only realize after you’ve fallen that these three relatives are not family, but “toxic”.

The Relatives Who Laugh at You

Some relatives seem okay at first, but when you’re down, they love to laugh at you.

There are many people who enjoy laughing at others, but there are fewer who enjoy laughing at their relatives.

Some people think that having a relative in this world is not easy because, no matter what happens between you and your relative, they’re still family.

Like when I got into a fight with my cousin, we couldn’t stop arguing, but after we cleared things up, our relationship became even better.

So sometimes you’ll find that relatives are different from friends, but some relatives are not like normal relatives—they only know how to laugh at you.

When my uncle’s wife got heart disease, she urgently needed money, but some people refused to lend it to her and instead laughed at her. Seeing those relatives’ faces, I felt extremely sad.

Some relatives won’t help you and will even laugh at you. Helping others is not their responsibility, but laughing at others exposes their true nature.

If there are people like this around you, and they laugh at your relatives when they’re in trouble, these people have no love in their hearts.

The Relatives Who Kick You When You’re Down

Some relatives also like to kick you when you’re down, seeing you’re ill or having a hard time, and they’ll take advantage of the situation.

I remember when my brother got accepted into college, some relatives didn’t like it, thinking my brother shouldn’t be in college and should be working in a factory instead.

When my brother received the admission letter, some relatives came to our house, saying my brother shouldn’t go to college and should give up his education.

Later, when my brother went out to play, someone took his admission letter, and we were all very anxious because without the letter, he might not be able to attend college. But some relatives still kicked him when he was down, introducing him to a job in a factory.

Grandpa heard that someone had introduced my brother to a job, and my brother’s admission letter was gone, so Grandpa insisted that my brother should work in the factory and not attend college.

So some relatives will always kick you when you’re down, making things worse for you.

In this world, everyone needs to be cautious, and sometimes your relatives will hurt you more, just like some people do business and take advantage of their relatives, adding prices to the products they sell to them. Later, when you find out the product is bad, you’ll be angry but can’t say anything.

So when doing things, you must be cautious, and sometimes you shouldn’t believe what your relatives tell you.

The Relatives Who Ask You for Money

“Human nature cannot withstand testing; don’t easily test human nature.”

This is a sentence our university lecturer said during a speech.

At that time, I was young and didn’t understand, but now I do.

This year, a friend sent me a message saying:

“Dear, do you know? I’ve been sick for a long time, and when I was sick, my uncle came to our house asking for money because he thought I was going to die soon and wanted to get his money back, fearing he’d lose out in the future.”

When I saw my friend’s message, I felt a pang in my heart, thinking that in life, we’ll always encounter some people who will hurt us.

When we’re in trouble, some people won’t think about our situation and will only think about their own interests, so they’ll ask us for money.

Some people are more emotional and will consider others’ feelings when they’re sick, so they won’t ask for money right away. However, some people are not like that.

But think about it, if someone who’s not a relative asks you for money, you’ll feel sad, but if your relative asks you for money when you’re sick, you’ll feel extremely sad. On one hand, you’ll feel sad because your relative thinks you’re going to die soon, and on the other hand, you’ll feel that your relative is very cold-blooded, and you’ll feel sad about the world’s cruelty.

Some relatives not only won’t help you when you’re down but will also add to your troubles, thinking only about their own interests, even if it means hurting you.

These people will give a dying person, or someone who’s fallen, a deadly blow, making them lose the will to live. When someone is in trouble, they need comfort and help, but some relatives will do the opposite, making them sad and hurt.

In this world, it’s not necessarily true that relatives are better than friends. Sometimes friends can be better than relatives.

Don’t think that relatives are the best; whoever treats you well is the best.